Hopefully I can get over this soon.

Anyways, since this post doesn’t have anything cool, you get some more CollegeHumor.com pictures.

Coolest. Monkey. EVER.

Is it ok to joke about him now? Who cares, this is funny!

Unfortunately, my jacket was taken by mistake or on purpose at the rail on Saturday night, and in the pocket was my wallet and car key. Luckily, I was carrying my ID and cash in my pocket, so the loss isn’t that bad.

Hopefully, my jacket will be returned with my wallet. It’s not like the culprit has much to gain, as we all know about my car and it’s “problems”. If not, I have a spare key at home and my wallet is replacable.

Apparently, the Gorgatron is taking the loss pretty hard (she just grabbed my by the face and licked me in the nose), so I’ve gotta go. Thanks to all that wished me a happy birthday.

I don’t quite remember the chronological order of things, or exactly how everything went down, so I’ll just list some of the pranks and who did them for all to see.

Adrain:

Dave:

Dave, Adrian, and Jared:

Me:

Keep in mind, most of my pranks were retaliatory. It seems that we are all evened up now, so the pranks my stop for a bit. However, we all have something in mind if they start up again – let’s hope for the sake of our health that they don’t.

It begins with the site of eachother. Somehow women possess a certain ability to sense other women in the vicinity. It’s not line of site, they can sense around corners and through walls. Who knows when they gained this ability?

So, once they’ve sensed eachother, they some how home in on eachother. When they catch first site of eachother, you can often witness a subdued wave towards eaother. Then they sort of shrug their shoulders and put on a half-excited smile as they venture towards eachother – a deception of excitement. A melancholy “Hiiiee” (emphasis on the “ee”) can be heard as they home in eachother, preparing for battle.

As they enclose within inches of eachother, one woman will open her arms as the other defenslessly submits to a dainty and insincere hug. This is where the deceit and deception begin. Through what sounds like a casual and harmless conversation of the past hours activities, they are secretly playing word games to plant gossip packing bombs in eachother’s social ring. These gossip bombs can be measured in megatons, just as the nuclear bombs of WWII were measured.

After minutes of coded words that may barely pass as English are exchange, the two girls part, usually with an effortless “Byyee” (again, emphasis on the “ee”) exhanged between them. At a critical distance, D = 2 meters, both parties retract the meaningless smile they once wore and instead show a face of determination, a determination to destroy their enemy’s social faculty. Their weapon of choice? A small device, which we will call a “celly” (let’s be technical here), used to instantly alert their comrads of impending doom or strike efforts to be mounted later that night. Tactical details often include which outfits have been worn and what the enemy plans to wear and has worn so far.

All this in a 2 minute conversation. Mount up troops, this one may take us into the night.

- Adam Kuhn